What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

Why? Because.

What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

What is my name? I dont know

And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

What kind of drugs should you take when you are too stressed? Fabulous secret magic drugs, makes all your problems go away... TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! Warning: When you take drugs, you are taking a very big DRUG.

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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