What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +10

you will like this because i am black.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's better than a stick? A stone

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

thumb_up thumb_down +10

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops