What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

Knock, Knock Come in

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

What long black and tasty? Licorice

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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