What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

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How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

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What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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An Irish man, Scots man and a Welsh man walk into a bar. The barman says, "what is this some kind of joke?!" Peter, who lives in Cardiff, returned home, depressed that he is viewed as some sort of clown. It reminded him of when he was a school boy; a giant spot appeared on his nose. The kids just laughed at him. "Don't worry Peter" he said to himself, "It will all be over now... He later hung himself. His family have been informed.

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A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

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A young penguin walks into a bar with tears streaming down his face. "Whats wrong with you?" asks the barman. "I've lost my Dad", says the Penguin. The barman asks, "What's he look like?"

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

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Why did the girl run over the road? Her buttons rolled to the other side! (From a book called... Al-capone does my shirts) (Natilie)

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NEVER

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roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

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Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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