whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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