Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops