How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the couple sell their house? their children were all raped and then murdered in it and they cant stand the memories

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If you come to Anti-Joke.com to look at the Newest jokes please leave a comment. Thank you!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops