What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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My cat just died.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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8

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did the man fart? He didn't. Stop being so dirty-minded.

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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Why do sharks swim in salt water? Pepper water makes them sneeze! Why do whales swim in salt water? They can't survive in fresh water.

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops