There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Get on the boat.

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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