did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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God is real.

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Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

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. . I am a whale

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Nothing. The deer was transported to a specialist animal hospital and now has two working eyes, eliminating the purpose of this joke. We apologise for wasting your time.

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What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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i like turtles

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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