A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...