What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

Poop

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

feminism

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

Knock knock I'M IN THE BATHROOM !!

Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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