knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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justin bieber walks into a bar, he is then kicked out because he's under age.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said, "No change. He's likely to die, too."

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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