what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

being sober in a bar fight

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats 1+1? window!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

thumb_up thumb_down -14

One, two, three, four and five

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops