A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

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Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

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What do you call a black man on the moon - A Problem What do you call 5 black men on the moon - A Bigger Problem What do you call every black person on the moon - Problem Solved!

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Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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What do a woman and a puzzle have in common? Both couldn't vote before 1920... the puzzles still can't vote

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im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

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How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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