- Anti Joke

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

,Do you know what hapened to the janitor who cleaned the school halls? He finished the job, got paid a reasonable amount and went home to his average family.

Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

"I'm terrible at writing jokes." -80% of the people on here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

Women.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

What did billy get after sex? Herpes

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed