In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

A whole 'nother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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