How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

My three children are three big mistakes.

What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

Men's rights

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

How many TV shows are there? A lot.

three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple? Rape and child abuse.

womans rights...

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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