Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Wow! I've seen this joke before!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops