What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hello, my name is John, and you are reading this paragraph. Find the mistake...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops