Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

What's worse than strapping 10 dead baibes to a tree? Strapping a dead baby to 10 trees.

So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

Why was the little boy laying on the ground unconscious? because I threw a fridge at him.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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