What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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