Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

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Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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What did the boy say when he could'nt find his dog? I wonder where Spot went.

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Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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[Set up] [No punch line]

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops