chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics? Not being retarded.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

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Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

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What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

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whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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