Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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Dwarf Shortage

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A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

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Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops