Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

Andoni was here

my egg roll

Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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