-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

How do you make a man cry? you torture him

A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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