My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Knock Knock Who's there

a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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