Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

the WNBA.

Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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