What is stupid and looks like you? You.

"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

A man goes to the potty.

Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

so 3 guys are a plane George W. Bush, a mexican, and a chinese man. the plane is going down because of too much weight they haave to throw things out. The mexcan throws out a suitcase full of tacos and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then the chinese throws out a suitcase full of rice and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then George W. Bush pushes the mexican out and says "we have to enough of these in out country."

What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

What's the difference between a person who can differentiate an anti-joke from a joke and one who cannot? Other than being able to tell the difference between the two types of humour, it is impossible to tell, as no further information is given.

Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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