What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Good job, son.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

time to spruce up!

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

Whats the leading cause of death Life.

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

womans having rights.

Two guys walk into a bar. They have drinks, pay for them, then get into a car crash killing a mom and her daughter returning home from selecting a wedding dress. The wedding is canceled. Rate This Comment 0

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...