what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

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What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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