What would you do if I said a horse ate your mother? It doesn't mattet, I didn't

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What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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