Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You know what's funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -5

race-car = rac-ecar

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops