Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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star wars kid

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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A boy with red hair is happy.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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