Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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haha

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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Did you hear the one about the flying turtle? No? Okay I'll tell you about it. So one day there was a flying turtle. His name was Larry and he was a turtle that can fly. However, nobody believed that Larry can fly and he wanted to prove it. So the next day George, who was a flying octopus, called Jerry on his cell phone and told him a story about a Larry. Jerry, who was a media reporter, was so offended by his story and called the police. Question: What did the police say? Nothing because it was a made up story

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Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

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.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops