What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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