I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

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What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

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why did tyler detweiler walk across the street? he didnt he has ceribral palsey

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

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Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops