what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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this website even though its hilarious.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

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An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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