There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

Haha, I get it..

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

hey guys im gay

Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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