Why did the boy drop his vannlai ice cream?because Vannlia ice came.

Rose are red, Violets are blue Your cat is dead Turkey

Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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