how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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If life gives you lemonade.

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When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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How many pancakes does it take to lift up a dog house? Silly goose, alligators can't fly!

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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