What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Dislike if you are a prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

i like turtles

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

when there's trouble lurking in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call? The local authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man finds a magic lamp and rubs it. A genie appears and says that he will grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish for a duck". POOF! He got a duck. Then he says "I wish for a penguin". POOF! A penguin magically appears. He thought long and hard for his 3rd wish. Then he said "I wish I had a turtle" POOF! Suddenly out of nowhere the genie disappears. The man looked inside the magic lamp and saw a small turtle. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops