What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

My name is Will I am a real homosexual

69

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

Good job, son.

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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