A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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What do you get when two black men walk into a bar? A few salesmen celebrating their recent pay raise.

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Adam Claypool is a fag. and his mother sweats my cum. Now that we got that out of the way lets get to the jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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Why did the cookie go to the doctors? It didn't because cookies are Inanimate and are incapable of mobility

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops