Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

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So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

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Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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Once upon a time, there was a boy. He was 12 years old. He is dad was rich from his business and so when it came time for his 12 year old boy to turn 13 he insisted on buying the boy whatever he wanted. He thought that the imagination of a 12 year old boy might in fact humour him, even if the cost of such a present reached the millions. He asked his son "Son, a very special day's coming up", his son smirked "I know Dad". "Well, what would you like?" asked the Dad. His son pondered for several seconds before replying, "honestly Dad, all I want it 12 Pink Ping Pong balls". The Dad, curious and a little disappointed asked "of course son, but why?". His son replied "I can;t say, I'd just like them for my birthday please". And so on his thirteenth birthday, he indeed received 12 Pink Ping Pong balls. His Dad thought nothing of it until next year, when he asked his son "what would you like for your birthday this year son? A new 82-inch Tv for you toilet, or how about a new jet?". His soon blew the hair out of his eyes and said, "Dad, all I want is room full of Pink Ping Pong balls". His dad again agreed but asked "why Pink Ping Pong balls son?". His son replied "I'll tell you when I get them". True to his word when the boy turned 14, he received a whole room full of Pink Ping Pong balls and his Dad asked him "now why did you want them son". But his son replied "I'll tell you next year". Rather reluctantly his Dad agreed. and then he died.

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Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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