- Anti Joke

2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

your mamma so dumb she makes frankienstien look smart

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

Fat? Jesse Z

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

what is big and white? Your Mom

jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you know what time it is? Because I don't wanna be late for class and if you told the time, it will surely help me because I'll be able to arrive early at my class not to mention it would greatly improve my punctuality efforts to help me pass the class this semester. Geez, I remember back in middle school there was a guy name Billy Jones and he used to always be late for class. His name was Billy but we called him Bill. Bill was his nickname but his real name was Billy. Anyways, he was always late for class because he would always make the best barbecue ribs in town.... (45 minutes later...) ....and I told Bill, "Man, if you were to just ask what time it was it would greatly help you in arriving to class early." And he was was like "I know but..."And then I cut him off and I said "But nothing. I don't care what kind of barbecue ribs you make, you just can't do that." So there I was, me and him, sitting down and .... (3 hours later...) ...it was awesome. Boy, I remember back in the early 90's when I was at elementary school, it was a stormy weather and we had to go to class. That's when I met Clarissa. She was a really nice girl and I remember there was a time when... (to be continued....)

You: That was awful. Me: You know what else is awful? You: What? Me: This joke.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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whats long, fat, and people love it in their mouth? blunts.

how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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