Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

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Dumb

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

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You are joking right?

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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