a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

thumb_up thumb_down +7

roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the fish fly It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops