Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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