Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

kill yourself....with a cigarette

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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