You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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whats black and strange a paki

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Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

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What did the Ginger get for his birthday? A soul...................................……................……………•

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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What did the basketball player do before he scored a basket? Shot the basket ball

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Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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Listen, I do not really care anymore, I admit it, I dont mind screwing with people, but if your name is Tifa, my name is lets see... Solid Snake, yeah, but call me big boss. Listen, be honest with me, if you do not trust me, just do not give me a random name, Tifa as in Tifa Lockheart? Final Fantasy? Wake up, girl/guy, you are losing your touch at this.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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