Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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what unique about 3 red signs and 1 blue sign right next to eachother? there all the same colors!!!!except for the blue sign.

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Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

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cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

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When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

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A panda , a cheetah, a dog, a spider, and an eagle are in Antarctica.. The eagle looks around at the other baffled animals and says " What is this????? This isn't right! I'm so confused!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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What is not a car park? Clash of clans

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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